What’s socially adjusted anyway?

Sometimes for escapism I watch Channel Five’s ‘New Lives In the Wild’. I can’t always do it; Ben Fogle’s ignorant remarks about home education grate on me so much I have to switch over. This recent programme got me just the same. He’s revisiting some of the families featured on his programmes five years ago […]

What’s socially adjusted anyway?

Thank you, Ross: this! XXxxx

A rant….

I stopped writing for a while, definitely pulled down by 2020.

I’m back, maybe because the American election left me with a sliver of hope again… well, it did actually, but that’s not why I’m here! I’m spilling out my rage dreams into something here, I only hope I can be coherent!

Humans are humans. Biologically, we have obvious differences between male and female humans, with variations in dna there are many different experiences along this gradient and within this spectrum. I must find a great article that was shared explaining this.

I’m not talking about trans rights here today, but let it be known that they matter and also BLM and any other statements that show validity to people who have been treated awfully because they aren’t any kind of majority within their society. That’s definitely a subject for many other days!

Today I just want to rant about gender expectations. They have always got my goat and when I heard that neuroscientists couldn’t tell the difference between genders when they did brain scans, I found a way to understand my frustrations a little more.

We are humans, we all like different things. When I found out I was having a boy for baby 3, I read a book about mothering boys, as I believe they are harder to raise within our WEIRD society, even easier to mess up! It was an excruciating read, boys are like this (insert: physical, behind girls, more emotionally stunted), but not all boys, and sometimes girls will be like this…every section! My reply: well duh! Humans are all unique and have different characteristics, the only reason we see these characteristics as girl/boy is because of the society we live in! The reason boys and girls tend towards these sides is…..the society we live in! Gah! We are all influenced by the world around us, whether we notice it or not!

I’m going to need to stop there for this post and take some calming breaths before the children wake!


Love Is Our Superpower

Some positivity!

I believe that Love Is Our Superpower and even set up some social media to that effect last year, but others are already pursuing that line of thought and I realised I still didn’t have a clear idea how to share my version of it.

I saw an IGTV (Instagram video) from Holiday Phillips recently on using Love to fight change, not anger and really identified with it.


It seems difficult to work out how to use love when so much hate is spread around and I ended up thinking anger must be the only way.

I shy away from anger and don’t think I can be the only one, so the idea of letting myself be angry, but then turning it into an action from love is something that feels possible.

I really hope to connect with people over this, it feels in a similar vein to the Craftivist Collective which I also aspire to. Maybe I can be genuinely useful to the all too many causes that need traction to make sure that ALL the life on this planet can have space to be.



My latest FutureLearn foray has been looking into the Universal Declaration of Human Rights in association with Amnesty International.

I feel determined, yet broken and hopeless after it. Hopefully, that says more about me than the course! I think it was a good course, very informative and thought-provoking.

It was scary to see the safety information at the beginning, making me realise how lucky I am to live in the UK and never having had to consider these things before. You will see the pattern now: I then began to feel desolate that the UK is in such a state, yet it is still so very much better than countries where you fear for your life if you try and ask for even a basic right. Am I illustrating my ridiculous rollercoaster through this course? 

I am privileged enough to be shocked and outraged that these fundamental things aren’t even a given in ‘developed’ countries, and was very much left with my view of basically good humans in tatters. Surely, if we’re mostly good, it couldn’t have gotten as bad as this?

I am left trying to see the good and follow the adage to ‘look for the helpers’. There were certainly plenty of them on the course; lovely, courageous people, but seemingly outnumbered by the people who can only see the power.

My advice to myself: Baby steps. Focus on those tiny things which can build up to something worthwhile. Stagnation benefits no-one. 




I am very grateful that FutureLearn has the option of studying a great range of subjects for free, I could never have afforded to spend actual money on myself! I hope one day to be able to pay to study as a way of supporting them, though I imagine paying to have a certificate to prove your learning can be useful.

I have meant to study subjects on this site many times over recent years, never getting into the flow of actually taking them in amongst the business of life. I started off trying things that could help me with Home Education in the future, but I have found that HE is all consuming in the now and predicting where it was going to take me would have been a waste of time! 

I have recently enjoyed a course on the status of Education and changes we can make, at the same time struggling with one on Politics and Economics, the difference being that I wanted to study these things for myself, carving out a few minutes here and there during my week. 

I enjoyed the Education course, as I had enough knowledge to get to the crux of the matter quickly and then easily get involved and engage with others. It definitely helps that I already have an idea where I’d like the education system to be going and was keen to share and compare suggestions. A bonus was how international the course was, giving me insights around the world and really opening up my views and understanding.

The Politics and Economics course was very good too. My issues were my own! After the first few sections, my lack of economic knowledge was holding me back, and my lack of extra time to try and plug the holes meant that I didn’t feel able to catch up. I am unsure whether I want to fill the gap now, as I don’t think I can cope with the stress of economics, it seems like a negative profession to me, why do we even want any growth to be so necessary anyway?! There was a table showing how there was no growth before we settled down more and started industrialisation, we just kept on keeping on, improving systems to help with problems and making sure there was enough for getting on with. I can only see the rise of rich people on the back of other’s labour from then on and hate that humans can be that selfish and cruel.

I needed these small wins, however, to feel I have accomplished something and that I’m going in the right direction as I am hoping to start an OU degree at some point and know that that will be intense and need much more of my time.

I feel that these small learning goals are helping me to engage with the world without so much overwhelm and will maybe even help me choose a direction to go in.



Getting on with it

I have had this blog set up for 3 years now and have yet to make a start!

This is my start. I set it up because I had had enough of all the injustice I was seeing; but what to do about it?

I so often feel too overwhelmed to function at all, let alone fight injustice. I realise I can’t fix the world, but I want to help with something.

I was hoping to find my way through to choosing a cause I could identify with and feel I could positively influence, and then I could follow a neat plan and record it all on here. Ha!

Life is messy, humans are messier still. I am ready to dive in to the mess and just record whatever thoughts I may be having and hopefully one day there will be some sense that I can build on.